“I do not accept my hypersensitivity. I don’t like my voice, my hips, my tall / short waist. I don’t deserve this person in my life. I always live the same hurtful and humiliating situations. Nobody loves me: I am less than nothing.”
This is what a person with low self-esteem would say.
But what exactly is self-esteem?
What is it made up of?
How does it work and how to improve it What is self esteem?
It’s the assessment of one’s own worth
Self-esteem is a key factor in personal success. It is strongly linked to wounds of the soul, but also to the state of mind.
Self-esteem is a person’s assessment of his own worth.
The value of something is the representation one has of that thing, quantitatively, qualitatively or financially. So self-worth is the qualitative representation we have of ourselves.
In other words: it is a value judgment that you make on yourself.
So low self-esteem is like having a low-quality representation of yourself: you consider yourself to be worth very little or nothing at all. In contrast, having high self-esteem comes down to having a very high-quality representation of yourself: you consider yourself to be worth a lot.
It is a behavior that results in behavior of guilt and self-deprecation. It decreases persistence, wastes time and energy, and prevents the development of self-confidence.
I have listed 7 reasons why everyone should improve their self-esteem.
Self-esteem is at the crossroads of self-image, self-love and self-acceptance
Self-esteem is the value you place on yourself. It is based on 3 elements:
🔸Self-image: it’s how you see yourself physically, mentally and spiritually. Too big, too small, too curious, not curious enough, too down to earth, too perched. In short, any value judgment on the image you send to others and to yourself.
🔸Self-love: this is the most important dimension of self-esteem because it is through this that the other two will naturally improve. Self-love is that you have enough love for yourself, for your body, your behavior, your habits, your past, etc. This love allows you to forgive yourself more easily for your mistakes and to develop your indulgence towards yourself.
🔸Self-acceptance: it’s accepting your nature, accepting who you really are. This also includes accepting your shadows, your mistakes, your difficulties, your sometimes harmful actions for yourself or others. It is accepting what is in the present moment, good or bad. Accepting who you are allows you to develop an image of yourself that is neutral and improves your overall self-esteem.
How does self-esteem work?
In general, the 3 elements do not go without the other. A bad self-image usually stems from a lack of love and self-acceptance. And conversely, a lack of self-acceptance is often linked to a lack of self-love and a poor self-image.
These 3 elements are intertwined and inseparable. To improve your self-esteem, you will need to work together on these three elements. However, the most efficient process is as follows:
- Self-image is the starting point for self-esteem. So this is the starting point for improving it. Taking stock of the way you look at yourself is the first step.
- Then, it is with self-love that you will manage to change your image of yourself if it is demeaning. By giving yourself love every day you will learn to see yourself differently until your image of yourself sees yourself as fully empowering and positive.
- Finally, self-acceptance is the last and more difficult step because it involves accepting your whole being, including your dark sides and your past. It is a work that is done especially during the process of healing wounds of the soul.
To go deeper :
Another article : “7 reasons why you should improve your self-esteem”
“Heal yourself and find your true self” from Lise Bourbeau
“Ego : the greatest obstacke to healing the 5 wounds” from Lise Bourbeau